That was Easy. See how Easy that was? It’s Easy, you can do it. I say this. To my kids. To other people. To myself. In reality who am I to decide what’s “easy?” We ALL say this, in one way or another. Its a defense mechanism. It’s a way to encourage and motivate and say I believe in you, you need to believe in you too. It comes from a good place, a place of love, but also it’s an EASY answer, an EASY way out, when really the answer isn’t easy at all. I happen to have that Big Red “Easy Button,” that thing they sell on Amazon that when you hit it it says “that was easy!” I love this thing. My kids loved it when I first got it as a gift from a friend back when I was in that time I so affectionately call “in the thick of it.” I used it a lot back then for fun as a reminder that I could do hard things. So kind of the opposite of easy, right? But it worked, for me, to make progress on something then hit that button and be reminded that I can do hard things. But sometimes? Sometimes that hard thing was getting up, showering, and making some sort of attempt at working, “mom-ing,” and making it through a day anger and tear free. And you know what looking back? That was certainly not easy. To tell myself, “that was easy” is so far from the truth and nothing but that defense mechanism to keep us going. I have learned that easy doesn’t get us very far. It doesn’t stretch us. It doesn’t bring us all the life has to offer. It doesn’t bring us to the place we all really strive to be as human beings. And thats a place of living in love and in joy. Easy is a mask, a cover, a quick fix, a short term solve. Call it what you want, but its certainly not the answer to living as we were intended to live. Yes, each and every one of us.
As time has progressed, as it always does, my personal growth game is running strong. I say that with a bit of tongue in cheek of course. There are growth days, where I feel serious progress up this mountain I am climbing. Then there are days where I am pretty sure I have somehow slid back down, like a landslide that happened overnight. A stark reminder that, its not EASY. So it seems a little crazy to many, if not most, that I keep going. Believing. Pushing. Trying. Getting uncomfortable. There are days, the mornings after the “landslide,” that I ask myself the same thing. But then I stop. Because I know that Easy is not the answer. Easy doesn’t equal love, joy, personal happiness. I lived Easy. I had Easy. I had what I was “supposed to have” to create that happy, joyful life. And guess what? There was no living in love. There was no joy. And there certainly was no growth. I was someones wife, someones employee, someones mom, someones everything. What I wasn’t, was ME. The real, the raw, the authentic, the woman FIRST, the ME that I was born to be.
So growth it is. Hard is the new Easy. I can do hard things. So can my kids. So can you. Hard is climbing the mountain, even on the landslide days.Hard is digging deep in your mind, in your soul and asking the hard questions to and being willing to listento the answers. Hard means change. Hard means getting to know yourself. All of yourself. Mind. Body. Soul. Hard means doing things you never dreamed you would do in a million years. Hard means swallowing your pride. Hard means letting go of the stories we have created and writing a new story. Hard means doing things you don’t want to do, even when you don’t want to do them. And sometimes, like today, it means popping out of bed at 5am on a Saturday and opening your laptop and writing, because you “woke up” with a vision, a dream(literally,) and the inspiration to sit down and just write. Look around. And then look inward. Take the time, no MAKE the time, to really look inward. No-one, and I mean no-one ever said life was EASY…….and you know what ? I would have it no other way. Hard, really is the new Easy.